Wednesday, April 3, 2013

C is for Celibate

As in some people should stay that way. Indefinitely.

Call me stupid, but I am continuously amazed by the number of people who ask my advice about sex. I'm cupid, not Ann Landers. Hey, I get it, love bites. That's practically my mantra. But in my opinion - and yes, you asked for it - love and sex are are NOT the same.

I get lust. You other love fools scare the shit out of me.

But as my ever-proper assistant reminds me, I'm not allowed to censor. Which is a bold faced lie since she makes me censor my response.

Anyway, here's the celibacy question that keeps popping up in my inbox.
"My girlfriend wants us to take a one year vow of celibacy so we can decide if we're meant to be together. What should I do?"
Looks like my inbox isn't the only thing popping up. Ha!

So, you mean to tell me that after you've done the nasty, your girlfriend wants to put a cap on it? Either you suck, she's seeing someone else, or the chick is crazy. Who does that? Bloody hell.

I've heard of people waiting until marriage before getting busy, and hey, if that's your gig, all the power to you. But I can't think of one good reason to stop the action after you've already gone down the garden path. Sounds a little suspicious to me.

Yeah, I know, love bites.

- Jagger


  1. C laid great for you, Jagger! :-)

  2. You'll have to C how that goes!

  3. Makes about as much sense as those asshats who are all about "revirginizing". WTF?!